Sardarography - My Contribtion To Pornography

Wednesday, 28 March, 2007

The other day me and a brother of mine started talking about the eminence of Sikhs in different walks of lives suddenly shooting to stardom at the same time from the honorable prime minister of India - Mr. Manmohan Singh to the professor of technology marketing at Kellogg Mr Mohanbir Sawhney to the first original Punjabi rock star Mr Rabbi Shergill or Mr Malvinder Singh the pharma honcho from Ranbaxy. The Sikhs are making news on all fronts sans some like pornography. Now Now i know that pornography is not our culture it comes from the 'US' of 'A' but come on guys we bought about the 'Kama' of 'Sutra' which i believe is responsible for half of the fittest bodies across the globe.

So we(me and my brother) started to brain storm about what would it need for Sikhs to make it big on the pornography front. We narrowed down that we can not fit Sikhs into the mainstream pornography after all not all people have a hair fetish hence we would need to cater to a small segment of the industry a.k.a boutique pornography - offering services to a small segment of lustful minds.

Sardarography would promote acts like Butter chicken Licks, Chittar Fetish, Tandoori Eff's, Sex la Patiala, Balle Balle Balls - the list being endless.

Here my friends i have taken the first step to bring Sikhs into the ever growing market or pornography. :-)

P.S: This can also be seen as a sign that i'm having no work these days. Managers please note.

Obituary

With profound grief i announce that i have lost my favorite pair of Jeans. We were together for about 5 years from 2'nd year of college. Here are some of her last pics. :-(

I got tons of compliments in her last days - 'coz she was faded just right but sadly its time for me to start afresh.

I'll miss you my jean.

Punctuation - The Way I See It

Ever since i started penning my thoughts since last year a number of people have given me advice/feedback/support for my style of writing. Which i do not know what it is. But yes one thing which i clearly recognize when i look at my posts is that they are not punctuated well.

When i initially received feedback from a friend whom i shall refer as 'M' that 'there are so many spelling mistakes and errors in your post' i took it rather seriously and started to religiously run spell checkers on my posts before publishing them. To be very truthful i don't enjoy running spell check on my posts because to me its processing my post and i detest that. I like it the way it is - on the face with its imperfections. moreover everything in today's times is processed from food to news to babies so why not stick to the old school and not process this shit which i write - i mean the world really does not need processed shit. Do You ?? :-D

My take on Punctuation -
Whats matters is that you pass the message across - loud and clear, weather or not it is spic and span is not the reason why i write but yes not giving too much feedback on feedback (i see all sapient people reading closely now) i promise over the time you shall see more distinctly clean punctuation. Remember to pay attention to the posts now on and let me know if its improving.

Family Time

Saturday - Feb 24, 2007
Today's my folks 33'rd marriage anniversary. I take it as 16.5 Years though or less - Coz practically my dad has spent half of his life on the ship. In his job there ain't any holidays like this i guess. A man's got to do what a man's got to do.

My dad's on the ship these days so it was me and my mum - took her to a Chinese Place for Steamed Dim sums. Funny Thing happened - I was using cop sticks to slice the dim sum into half and the chop sticks were like strong plastic ones. Zap - The chopstick broke into 2 but the dim sum was there unharmed. Anyway all in all the place sucks

Don't know what to say - Did i not know how to have dim sums with chopsticks? Was the Dim sum too hard to be sliced into half? I'm not even attempting to answer this. lol

Took my maa for some Heavenly Mocha which was great and shopped for some CD's. Rest of the day went in catching with my extended family and my granny. She's happy when i spend time with her. Get so scared about seeing them old. I would use the phrase 'Happy Sad' about the whole experience of meeting my family.

Coffee and Cognac

Friday - Feb 23, 2007
Today's the day i fly back to a country called India, Just got to know last evening that i had spent now 192 days in year 2006 in my motherland - Canada. Saw all seasons mets fellow Canadians and Chinese and Russians and Lankans - sorry no Canadians - They don't exist. Eff it - I'm an Indian a true brown man.

Got on the Flight with no excess baggage the 'lady' behind the counter was understanding enough to let me allow to check in slightly over weight baggage. Over the past the 'cow' behind the corner was an 'ass' but this time she was a 'lady'.lol

Broke all personal records of watching movies end 2 end. 4 movies and no drinks. Can you beat that. The movies were

Babel - Must watch movie for anyone who likes Guy Ritchie's movies or the one's who liked Crash or Nagesh Kuknoor's Teen Deeware.

A Good Life - Good movie for those who are French or Who want to be French. Talks all about Bon Jour (Not Bon Jovi please). Russell Crowe delivers a great show and best part is his secretary who through all through the movie never fitted the setting where the movie is all about French country side, French Wine, French Women and i was so right she was a Indian settled in UK.

The world's Fastest Indian - Movie based on the life of Burt Munroe, whose record set in 1967 for fastest speed achieved on a bike under the 1000cc category still remains unbeaten. Also a good show of manner's down under in 'US' of 'A'. Mate! U got to see it.

My personal Fav - Forest Gump - The movie's so well done that i don't tire seeing it again and again. Jannny !!

By the time i was done with FG - Lousy Indian Dinner was served i mean for once KLM should acknowledge - Upmaa is to be served HOT not Cold. Eff it. The Physicist from Euthania seated next to me asked for Coffee and Cognac. I could not understand the combination but it was to be tried. Its good believe me or not But he and me had it the opposite way - he finished his cognac first and coffee after it i did the opposite.

Lets wait for the jet lag to kick in now !!

Yippee - Delhi here i come !!

Just got my tickets done for 22'nd for the trip back to India, Delhi - and i'm all excited to be a part of the rush be a part of fellow brown men, part of the crowded bazaars and no SNOW scare.
take my word for this - It does not snow in toronto - i stayed in toronto downtown for abt 3 months durning winters n its a joke when someone says that it snows heavily. Liars !! ;-)

Just got introduced to the OST for Delhi Heights yesterday and it rocks - Features my fav singer Rabbi Shergill - the entire movie has his music and songs incl the already hit - Tere Bin.
He is by far and large the only musician who has been able to put the rock guitar sucessfully in punjabi music.

The movie i beleive (i'm just assuming) features a story set against the far and wide population of Delhi. All you chinese people need to be there once - you guys would love it. You would love the gradeur the business the sheer records delhites break in terms of number of people living per sq feet.

Its a mass of people living together and making it large. Delhi here i come !!
Vroom Vroom !!

Hibernation Season Coming To An End

Just came back from watching 'Eklavya' - The Royal Guard. Has all the biggies of the bollywood industry in it and the soft and subtle Vidya Balan too - All white people who like Indian woman google 'Vidya Balan' - The face of India ;-)

Month's been kind of slow yet happening in one way. February is essentially the month of financial crisis for me. Have couple of dates to manage and they all require money money but its fun and I'm happy its coming to end.

There have'nt been any interesting posts this year so far. Have not read much still struck on 'Talk to the Hand' By Lynne Truss. The books for people who are mannered - ill or well both. Well mannered people should read the book and feel good about the thought that they form the moral fiber of the book on the other hand ill mannered people should read the book and accept that the book in a strict sense would force you to choose between being sauve a.k.a english or comfortable. Stuff like not talking in trains. If talking then excusing. No 'Eff Off' or 'Effing' ever. :-) Lynne must be crazy - Effing is just an inch away from being included in the 'Book of good Manners'.

LT presents an interesting perspective about how does self servicing abilities are 'rude'. Personally I loved that part in which she clearly explained that an automatic answering machine at a bank though says please but does not mean anything.


Thats all for now - Eff Off !! :-) lol
P.S - I'm learning from the book u see - No 'F' word.